September Tears
by My Silver Wound
Summary: Beast Boy’s parents worked in the Twin Towers. After the 9.11 terrorist attacks, they were never found. A depressed slump has led him to Slade, but when the Titans save him, they’ll soon discover several “changes” have taken place. RaeBB [FINISHED 6.14]
1. Prologue

When Beast Boy's parents are killed in the 9/11 attacks, Slade takes advantage of him. And after four long months with Slade, the Titans will discover several "changes" have taken place.

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Prologue

It was almost nine o'clock on a beautiful, crystal-skied September morning. It was Tuesday, and Beast Boy had been up since around five thirty watching his daily dose of classic cartoons.

A news alert jolted him out of his daze.

"...a hijacked plane has crashed into the World Trade Center Twin Towers, killing hundreds, possibly thousands. We will update throughout the day..."

The cartoon flipped back onto the screen as though nothing had happened. Wile E. was chasing Road Runner as though no tragedy had taken place. Road Runner fled swiftly, beeping as though he were enjoying it.

Beast Boy just stared, unable to comprehend the tragedy. His mind repeated over and over what the reporter had said, but it wouldn't sink in. His parents were there. It couldn't be true. It couldn't be true. It couldn't be true.

But it was, and there was nothing he could do about it.

Author's Note: Okay so this is controversial! This was stuck in my head for a long time so I'm going to write a fic! If you don't want to read a 9/11 fic you don't have to. I'm not holding a gun to your head or a knife to your throat. This is really the only 9/11 part anyways. Hope you enjoy! Read and Review! Constructive Criticism! Flames accepted, although I'd appreciate it if you didn't flame it just because I said it was fine with me! Thanks!

LPL

Tina


	2. Living Dead

Chapter 1-Living Dead

Four months had passed since his tragedy—both of them really: the Twin Towers, the kidnapping, the betrayal…It was hard to believe that much time could pass so slowly…

The stench of mildew was almost more than he could bear. The smells of the past, of fear, of pain, and of despair followed him like the shadow of death itself. As hard as he tried, sleep would not come. Screams haunted him, silently hunting him down and destroying every morsel of sanity remaining in his mind, pushing him to the brink of falling though the dimension that he once knew as life to the fiery depths of insanity. As he lay in silence, he shed a tear, trying in vain to forget his past; to forget what it was like to be outside, to have friends—to live.

_Why haven't they come for me? Why won't they rescue me from this—whatever it is? They haven't even tried to reach me through my com-link. If they had, Slade would've done something to me. As punishment. Even though there's nothing I can do about it. _Beast Boy wept silently as he thought. _I thought they were my friends. I don't even know how long I've been here; I don't even know what time of day it is. All I want, more than anything, is for my friends, the Titans, to come and save me. But they won't. And Slade_—he stopped. He couldn't think of Slade; it was too painful. The burden of the things he knew, the things he saw, what Slade could—and would, for that matter—do…it was more than he could manage.

An alarm sounded urgently throughout the building. Beast Boy sat up on the thing he had called a bed for four months (Note to Self: If you've ever been to Hot Springs, North Carolina and stayed in the cabin resort in that little town, this mattress thingy is like those black things you have to sleep on. Very uncomfortable.) and paused a moment, hesitating before rising slowly to his feet, walked out the door, and down the back hallway towards the largest room in the front of the building. He dreaded to think of the many things that might await him there.

Beast Boy was left in darkness as he entered the large room. All was silent. He could sense another person's presence in the black gloom nearby. He stood, waiting for the chilling voice he new would come all in good time.

His eyes adjusted to the dim light of the room; the scene slowly appeared before him: Slade lying in a crumpled half-conscience daze in the left corner of the room, and the Teen Titans—his friends—standing triumphantly towards the right. Beast Boy stammered, unable to find the words to tell them how happy he was to see them. But before anyone could find these words, Slade spoke.

"Attack," came the simple command.

"But, Slade, I—" Beast Boy said unwillingly.

"Attack!"

Beast Boy sighed, defeatedly, then turned to face the Titans. "Guys, I—I'm sorry…Really…" Beast Boy blinked back tears.

"Beast Boy," Raven spoke gently, although her voice was firm, "come on, we're going home."

"Raven, I—I would, but I—I can't…"

Raven's voice filled with compassion as she pulled her hood down and replied, "Beast Boy—what's going on? Why can't you—"

"Please! I'm begging you—leave while you still can!"

"Beast Boy! I thought I told you to attack! Do as I command!" Slade's gruff order sounded from the corner, startling them and leaving them confused for a moment. Beast Boy turned to look at Slade, his eyes filling with tears. He faced the Titans once more.

He tried to hold the tears back, but it was all in vain. They came anyway. He fell weakly to his knees and sobbed. Raven stared sadly down at him, wishing she could do something as tears welled in her own eyes. She turned away, closing her eyes as she pulled up her hood. Robin put his hand gently on her shoulder.

"Let's go home." Raven told him dryly and continued walking away. The other Titans reluctantly followed, leaving Beast Boy down on his knees, sobbing wildly, and Slade, who was approaching the weeping boy. Beast Boy wished he hadn't started crying, as he knew what was coming.

Author's Note: Second Fic! YAY! My sister niobe10 helped me come up with pieces of this so she deserves some credit. I know BB's parents died in Africa. Who cares? Not me! Hey, it coulda been Cyborg's parents...:P Wait, never mind...PLEASE review! I really want some feedback and Constructive Criticism. Flame it if you want! Don't be short with it either—waist my time! Draw it out but don't beat around the bush with it. Explain and give examples. I want to know what to fix. Hope you enjoyed it! New chapter soon!

Luck Peace Love

Tina

PS Thank you to all of you who have reviewed my stories! I'm glad to hear you guys are enjoying my writing, but wait until Kelly gets on here—she is GOOD, but Cassie's the BEST. She doesn't FanFic though…:( no fun! Oh well…please give detailed reviews so I know what to keep and what to fix! Thank ya! Oh, and my profile's updated too, just so you know!


	3. Friends

Chapter 2-Friends

Raven flung the car door open so that it nearly flew off the car, and slammed it shut to the point the window cracked. Robin had the keys, so she waited impatiently as he walked over to the door in silence. He fumbled with the keys a moment before unlocking the door. Once open, Raven walked with quick paced strides and stormed to her room. The other Titans stared shockedly after her, all except Cyborg, who was still gaping at the cracked car window.

After a moment of gawking, Starfire spoke. "I believe our friend is in need of a friend in which to talk to about her horrible way of feeling at the moment. Shall I comfort her?"

"Maybe she just needs to be alone," Robin responded, a note of concern in his voice.

"Perhaps if I was to make her some of the foul-tasting tea of herbs, it will help ease her troublesome anguish?"

"I guess it's worth a try, but if she says to go away, it'd probably be better to leave her alone."

Starfire nodded, satisfied, and walked into the kitchen. She rummaged through several cabinets before finding the ingredients to Raven's tea. Unsure, she mixed the ingredients into a dark blend of tea-like perfume. Starfire sipped the mixture cautiously. The herbal tea reached her lips and, in her mind, she was sure it was right—the usual foul taste of Raven's tea. She smiled, pleased with herself and walked to Raven's room, carrying the small cup of herbal tea.

She hesitated before knocking on the door. After a moment's wait, the door was cracked. A pinkish-eyed, puffy faced Raven appeared, hood pulled up in attempt to hide the tears she'd been crying. Seeing Starfire, she quickly wiped her eyes and looked up at her, and Starfire was—for a moment—reminded of a lost, blue-eyed puppy lost on a Gotham City sidewalk.

"What do you want?" Raven asked sharply.

"I—wish to comfort you, friend. I will devote myself to training the oozing Urthulacs in the Grimpelorathian wintertime to help ease your troubled mind. I have brought you a small offering of your tea of herbs," she replied softly.

"R-Really? Thanks," Raven replied gratefully as she opened the door wider and took the small cup from Starfire. She put her lips to the cup and sipped the hot liquid, and attempted to look as though she wasn't about to gag. She swallowed painfully and thanked her once more.

Raven was about to shut the door when Starfire asked quietly, "May I enter? I wish to stay to do the 'chatting' and perhaps comfort you."

Raven thought for a moment, hesitating, and then replied, "Alright. Come on in." Starfire smiled sweetly and entered Raven's room.

"What is it that troubles you, friend?" Starfire asked as the door closed behind her, and darkness filled the ominous room.

The room was hollow, as if it was missing something, and was illuminated with silver teardrops of moonlight that dappled the floor and walls through the blinds that shaded the window. Despite the light of the moon, it seemed darker than usual, as though the pitch black of Death and Fear loomed about them, hunting them down to trap them within their evil clutches and fight over their trembling flesh. Starfire shuddered, the chill of the depression in the air filling her lungs and fingering her skin, its smooth fingers sliding across her flesh, chilling her to the bone.

Raven hesitated, trying not to cry. Finally, she spoke, shattering the silence around them. "Beast Boy," was all she could manage in a hoarse voice.

"I understand. It was quite shocking—I do not wish for him to suffer so."

Raven burst into tears as she spoke "I can't—I just don't understand. Back in September he said something about his parents and wouldn't tell me anything else about it. And now—now he's working for Slade, and won't even tell us what's going on now. I don't get it. Was he not happy here? Is that why he went to Slade? Why won't he just talk?" Raven laid her head on Starfire's shoulder, grateful for the company she had previously promised herself she would refuse.

"I am sure Slade is doing the 'blackmailing' to our friend. I am sure Beast Boy was happy here and would not turn to Slade—not after what he did to our friend Terra, as well as tried to do to Robin. We must save our friend before it is too late, and he suffers the same fate."

"There's nothing we can do now," Raven replied through a curtain of tears, "nothing but get over it and get on with our lives, and pretend he never existed as a friend."

"There must be some other way. We cannot abandon our friend. Especially not now, when he must need us the most." Her voice became distant as it faded away into a foreign murmur, and Raven fell into an uneasy sleep, as Starfire soon did as well.

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Thoughts pierced her mind as though they were knives as she slept. Each explanation bore more pain than the last. He had betrayed her. He gave a happy life up for nothing. His warm heart was transforming as he himself could, changing from a tender, vulnerable, naïve heart to hard, cold, coarse stone.

A seasick-like feeling rose within her as she thought. She couldn't change his mind. Something was holding him back. Something was forcing his betrayal. But what? She may never know. Unless…

_Unless I go back, _she thought. _I have to go back. I have to find out what he's hiding, and why he's holding back. I have no other choice._

At that, Raven forced herself to awaken, only to find herself still leaning in a sleeping Starfire's shoulder, which was now hot and sticky from tears. Being careful not to wake her, she moved to a point where she could lift the sleeping girl and carried her silently and carefully to her room. Once there, she opened the door and unmade the bed. Gently, Raven laid Starfire in her bed and pulled the covers over her. She thanked Starfire silently for everything and left the room silently.

Author's Note: Isn't this chapter so sweet? Reminds me vaguely of "Switched"—perhaps the RaeStar bonding? I loved typing this chapter, although it was hard to get a flow going. But I think I did. I also enjoy the bit with the herbal tea…not just for the humor, though—I think it shows how much she cared about Raven. I love some of the description in here—and I hope you do too! I hope you enjoyed this as much as I do. Look forward to hearing from you!

LPL  
Tina


	4. Not Okay

Chapter 3-Not Okay

The door to a somber room opened with a shriek of pain. A tattered Beast Boy limped through the door way and shut the door behind him. He walked lightly over to the hard cardboard-like mattress, which was set in the middle of the room and propped on four cinderblocks and wooden planks. He peeled away the gashed and sticky shirt he was wearing, revealing a back covered in bleeding gashes that slashed across one another. Gently he laid himself stomach-down on the mattress and cried.

He could hear them in the back of his mind, screaming insults at him: "Traitor! Dirty Traitor!" Robin growled. "Back-stabber!" Raven yelled. "Deceitful Melrikblerthwack!" Starfire shouted. "Rotten Liar!" Cyborg roared.

_Doesn't Slade get it? He won, and I lost. That's it! There's nothing anyone can do change it! Why won't he just leave me alone? He's already ruined my life to the point…_

He discontinued any thought about Slade, or of his Betrayal.

Betrayal. It was such a harsh word to describe what he had done to his friends. But, no matter how much he hated it, it was for their sake. Losing his life—suffering for his closest and only friends—was better than having to watch them suffer.

But now they were suffering. Suffering because they knew that he was alive, and of his Betrayal. Of everything. Of nothing.

Somewhere, a door opened. He debated for a few moments on whether or not he should see what—or who—it was. His answer was decided when static filled the communicator in his ear, followed by a voice.

"I do believe someone has ventured into our presence. Perhaps you should show them our best—it would be most…inhospitable to leave them to wander around aimlessly, now wouldn't it?"

Beast Boy stood carefully, putting on his shirt, and faltered to the door, opened it with an ear-shattering screech of omen, and staggered past it. He knew Slade had told him to search this decaying wreck of an industrial warehouse for anyone that shouldn't be there. That was precisely what he planned to do.

Room by room he examined the place, and was heading back to his quarters when, out of nowhere, a hand covered his mouth and pulled him into the doorway beside him. The door was closed silently, and another hand grabbed his shoulder and turned Beast Boy to face them. Beast Boy stared at the face for a moment in stunned silence before stammering in a forewarning whisper.

"…Raven?! What are you doing here?" he managed.

"Shh! You're coming home, Beast Boy," she replied urgently, "Slade isn't going to control you anymore."

"Raven, you—you've got to get out here! Before he comes back again."

"Beast Boy, what's going on? Why are you—"

"He's coming, Raven. You've got to get out of here! Please!"

"You're coming with me. I'm not leaving until you come with me."

"Raven, I can't. It's not that easy. Oh, Raven!"

Tears filled his eyes and blurred his vision as his knees gave in to the weight of the terrible burden and he fell, helpless and defenseless. She caught the weak boy in her arms and whispered soft comforts in his ear, as Slade had four months ago. (Note to Self: The "whispered soft comforts" thing (a metaphoric thing meaning Slade told Beast Boy exactly what he wanted/needed to hear)—NOT the in his arms thing…shudders That would just be creepy!)

"It's going to be okay, Beast Boy," she whispered passionately, "Everything's going to be okay." One of her smooth hands ran along his hair caked thick with grease and dirt, sliding down slick and damp strands of his long, scurvy hair, and the other on the back of his tattered, blood-soaked shirt. Factory gears clicked and churned rhythmically around them, whining and screeching with painful blares, as though they were singing a downhearted song of a depressed boy who denied his friends in a twist of sick Betrayal.

"No it's not, Raven," he replied, silver tears sliding down his face, "Slade won't let anything be okay."

Raven started to speak again, but was cut off by a straying voice. "I see you have found the guest I spoke of. Please show her our 'best', child."

Beast Boy stared up at the girl with a sad face that instantly reminded her of a sad kitten in a box on the corner of a Gotham street, complete with a sign that said "Free Kitten" that no one would bother to spare a passing glance to. As he stared, he could only manage to utter three words: "I'm sorry, Raven."

She turned to face Slade, who nodded. A deep burgundy cloth that seemed to be stained with the blood of Life itself was placed over her face, covering her mouth and nose. A perfume of wretched scents stimulated her thoughts, and all went dark.

Author's Note: Oh, so—cliffhanger…ful? I love to make up my own words. This is so sweet! Another sweet chapter with Raven. RaeBB haters, this is a RaeBB story. That was obvious in all chapters, though. (Note to Self: "Prologue" is NOT a chapter IMHO.) I really hope you're enjoying this. I'm trying to keep myself ahead, and that's why Chapter 2 took so long (Note to Self: Again, not including "Prologue".). I'm going to try to get Chapter 5 done quickly so I can put up Chapter 4. Read and Review. Constructive Criticism wanted and needed! LPL Tina


	5. Gears

Chapter 4-Gears

She awoke not knowing where she was. Darkness surrounded her, engulfing her in its black flames. There seemed to be no boundary between the ground she lay on and the ceiling that was lost in the darkness, but loomed somewhere above. For a moment she was afraid to move—perhaps the floor would crumble beneath her and crash down around her, and she would fall forever into a pit of despair and torture.

Finally Raven mustered all of her courage and stood. Nausea rose within her as the sickly perfumes of sweat and blood tickled her nose. She staggered, the grogginess of the substance that had been on the cloth Beast Boy had covered her nose and mouth with still lingering.

"What happened?" Raven thought aloud. Only a mocking echo dared to slice the silence and respond.

"Is anyone there?" Raven asked, and for a split second she thought a mimicking echo would once more be her only reply. But then the air around her filled with an ominous and violent feeling, and she knew she had been wrong. Dead wrong.

"Ah, Raven. So glad you could join us," he said with a voice so toxic it seemed to be venom from a snake's daggery fangs.

Her eyes grew wide as the ocean is deep, and her legs quavered beneath her. His voice pierced her mind, chilling her to the bone. She whispered his name in horror—though it was difficult to manage even that due to her current state of terror. She fell backward to the floor, catching herself with her hands so that she stood in a position similar to that of a "crab-walk" (not really so much, but it's the only thing I can think of).

"What's the matter, child? You aren't—afraid, are you?" Slade half whispered, challenging her mind in attempt to provoke her to fight.

Raven stood, anger flaring in her eyes for a brief moment as she responded, "I'm not afraid of you. There's nothing in the world to fear but fear itself. I'm not afraid of you."

Bravely she advanced toward him, and pushed him backward; he tumbled in the cool depths of shimmering glass and splintered wood as he flew backward and shattered the boarded-up window. He leapt through the window, landing on his feet and glaring angrily at her. Again, she moved toward him, and this time he thrusted her away. She flew backward, hitting the moving gear. Suddenly, it felt as thought she was levitating. She attempted to run toward him, only to discover herself lodged in one of the gear's grooves. The moon outlined another gear churning in sync with the one she was bound to, and she frantically struggled to free herself. After her attempts failed, she decided the only way to gain enough time to free herself was to stop the gears using her powers.

"Azerath, Metr—" Raven began but was cut short as the two gears came together, and a loud scream slashed through the night, and a loud cracking of bones splintered the night. The gears separated, and the now broken body of Raven collapsed from the notch she had been lodged within. Through weak eyes, she could see the moonlight dappling the floor, distorting the color of her blood until it was a silver river of sparkling wine.

Suddenly, as though by magic, it seemed like she was being pulled down into the darkness, as though a demon was pulling her down by the ankles into the fiery depths of Hell. The world spun around her, going dim and fading away into a glancing memory of the past. Darkness ensnared her as everything faded into a blur.

Author's Note: This is my favorite part of the whole story—for now. I like the way it turned out. It's sad, though…Raven and Beast Boy are my favorite characters (next to Slade, of course!). I can only imagine Raven's pain…Oh, and don't even ask because there is not going to be an alternate for this chapter—it's as is! It'll play an important roll (if all goes according to plan). Don't hate me for this! I know Rae fans will, but I'm not doing this due to hatred of the dark gal—I'm a lot like her, though I can be a WHOLE lot like BB! And please, also read Crying Wolf—it's SOO much better than this…I really hope you enjoyed this anyway. RR.


	6. Liar

Chapter 5-Liar

"You promised! You told me they wouldn't die! You said you wouldn't kill them!" Beast Boy was outraged as he stared at the limp and mangled body of Raven.

"My dear—naïve child," Slade responded coolly, "she killed herself. I didn't force her to come. I didn't force her to stay. I didn't force her to fight. I didn't force her to die. She is the one—"

"She didn't do anything to you! She just wanted to save me! Why do you always blame someone else? It's never your fault! It's always someone else's fault! You're just a liar that can't accept the truth! You've taken away my home, my friendship, my life—and now you've taken Raven! It's over, Slade. I'm done working for you. I'm—"

"Not going anywhere. You've signed a contract, and sworn to serve me. You wouldn't want to break a promise, would you?"

"You did. I'm your 'apprentice,' right? That means I'm supposed to follow in you footprints—learn from what you say and do. I lied, too. I'm leaving." Beast Boy turned and began to walk away, only to be grabbed by Slade.

"You're staying here, whether you want to or not."

Beast Boy glared over his shoulder, and his face twisted with anger and rage as he morphed into a green-and-black wolf. He snarled in warning, and Slade merely watched, a cold flame of scornful pity flaring in his eye visible for only seconds before vanishing into the mysterious mist of his eye.

Beast Boy mustered all of his strength and lunged himself toward Slade. Before Slade could react, he had his jaw clamped around his neck. Slade watched in horror, screaming and trying to pull the wolf away from him, only for his fangs to sink into his skin until Beast Boy could taste blood.

Finally Slade pried the beast off of his neck, and Beast Boy fell to the ground and shifted into a human. Slade glared down at him as he clutched his neck, which was oozing blood between his fingers. Both of them were panting: Beast Boy had put up a good fight against the powerful Slade, who was probably breathing so heavily from fear more that fatigue.

Slade advanced toward Beast Boy, who shifted into a gorilla and grabbed the fist that had been thrusted toward him. He lifted Slade with ease and through him across the room, and Slade hit the wall and sank to the floor.

Beast Boy stood, panting with anger as he stared at Slade. He waited for Slade to stand and attempt to attack once more.

He didn't move.

Beast Boy approached the unmoving body. He didn't move. Slade had apparently drifted into unconsciousness.

He sighed, turning away and walking to the side of the limp, pale, bleeding body of Raven. Beast Boy knelt down beside her, clutching her cold, feeble hands. He stared at her. It wasn't Raven—it couldn't be. The vulnerable, peaceful girl laying there—it wasn't his friend. It couldn't be. He couldn't have lost her, too.

But he had.

"Oh, Raven. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left. I shouldn't have listened to Slade. I knew what he could do. Oh, Raven...I'm sorry...it's my fault...I'm sorry...for everything..."

Gently, Beast Boy lifted her and walked to the door, staggering beneath the weight of Raven and the pain in every muscle of his body. He limped through the door and closed it behind him, leaving Slade—and the past four months—behind.

Author's Note: I found out that in my sister's story "The Price of Friendship" which I keep procrastinating to read, Robin is crushed in Factory Gears in the end (which is about the 300th time he dies...). I didn't steal this from her; just—borrowed it from her without knowing it was hers! Anyway...Aw, this is soo sad! I love writing this story! Yes, I was very inspired... Yes, Beast Boy is going back to the Tower. But how will the Titans react, especially when they find out that Raven's dead? Will they welcome Beast Boy, or will they find him as a foe? I'll let you know as soon as I figure it out! Oh, and as soon as I can find a place to stick it, I've been working on Chapter ½, which will explain what happened between the Prologue and Chapter 1.


	7. Returning

Chapter 6-Returning

He hesitated before ringing the Titans' doorbell—what if they wouldn't accept him? What if they thought _he_ killed Raven? (…had _he_ killed her?) He would just have to take that chance, he decided, but for now he would leave her by the back door. He could bring her inside sometime that night, so that no one would have to know—even though he'd have to tell them sooner or later.

The semi-black sky above him was shifting to twilight, and Beast Boy took a deep breath, and rang the doorbell. He heard noises of someone moving around inside, and the sound of an access code being punched in, so that the door could be opened. He wondered who would answer. Robin and Cyborg were the two main possibilities. The door opened, and a sleepy Robin appeared in front of him, yawning as the door had opened. Robin took a moment for the scene before him to sink in.

"…Beast Boy!" Robin's tiredness seemed to vanish. It seemed as though he had not yet noticed Raven had even left the Tower. "Beast Boy, come on in! Glad to have you back."

Beast Boy nodded slightly with a weak smile and walked in. Cyborg was standing in the corner of the hallway, peeking into the room. At the sight of Beast Boy, he immediately ran into the room.

"BB! What's up?" he said gleefully.

Beast Boy yawned in response. "Nothing…"

"Beast Boy, why don't you go ahead to sleep? We can talk in the morning. That goes for you too, Cyborg."

Both of them yawned in agreement and went their separate ways. Robin ran to catch up with Beast Boy, who was heading toward the back door where he had left the cold, limp Raven.

"Beast Boy, what happened?" Robin asked, falling into step in front of him, walking backwards so he could face him.

"Huh? Oh, you mean—Raven…" Beast Boy stared at the ground.

"Raven? What about Raven? What happened? What are you—?"

"Nothing," he responded quickly, then added, "Nothing happened. Look, I'm going to try and get some sleep, okay?" Beast Boy didn't wait for a response but instead rushed past Robin and into his room.

(Note to Self: Sometime that night he brought Raven in, but…yeah I didn't feel like typing all that out :))

Beast Boy pulled the covers away from his head to reveal the foreign light of morning shining in his eyes. It bounced gleefully off every corner of his wall it could touch, and its laughter made the grimness haunting him from the night before perish for a moment. Then it was back, and it burdened him like an anvil tied upon his stiff, numb back. He stood sorely, pain searing through every muscle of his body and mind.

He walked with an awkward limp to the bathroom and showered and changed. Then he entered the main room, where the other Titans had been lounging without even a small hint of a smile. For a while they hung around, not really doing much of anything. Cyborg and Robin thumbed madly at game controllers while Starfire flipped like a maniac through radio stations. Beast Boy plopped tiredly across the couch, his feet slightly knocking Robin's knee. Robin, however, was too wrapped up in his game to hardly notice him, much less deserving of an apology.

After moments of lingering there where he had landed in his apathetic plunk, he spoke sarcastically to the friends that mingled about the room. "Good morning, everyone. Aren't we _so_ energetic today?"

The Titans looked at him, raising eyebrows, and turned back to their activities.

"I'm going to go eat breakfast." Beast Boy stood, wondering if his so-called friends even noticed he had stood. Then, Robin spoke.

"Actually, we were going to go out for breakfast—if you're up to it, that is. Wanna go down and check out the new Breakfast Pizzas down at the Pizza Parlor?"

"Whatever."

"Well, we gotta wait on Raven to get up," Cyborg pointed out.

"I'll get her." Robin stood, but Beast Boy nervously sprang to his feet and stood between Robin and the door.

"Maybe we should just let her sleep. She'll be fine," he said in an anxious tone.

"Ookay," Robin said confusedly, "let's go then." At that, the four Titans departed their activities and crammed into the T-Car. Beast Boy climbed into the back seat beside Starfire and slammed the door. Starfire stared in wonder as Beast Boy looked over at her.

"What?" Beast Boy snapped. He turned to the window and rested his head against it, the uneven glass Raven had broken only the night before pinching and scratching at his cheek.

"Um…BB, you okay?" Cyborg asked as he looked at him from his rearview mirror.

"I'm fine," he retorted sharply, his gaze unmoving from the scenery outside. Cyborg and Robin looked at each other and shrugged. No one spoke the rest of the way to the Pizza Parlor, and, once there, they still hardly spoke the entire time.

They ordered three Meaty-Egg-and-Cheese pizzas and one Breakfast-Veggie pizza. Once the pizzas arrived, they quickly vanished—except for the Veggie, which Beast Boy merely twiddled with as he slouched in the chair, almost sick with boredom. And guilt.

Robin, Cyborg, and Starfire chatted randomly as they waited for Beast Boy. Finally, Beast Boy said to them blandly, "Can we _please_ go now?" The Titans didn't argue but merely agreed, and they crowded into the car and rode back to Titans Tower. No one spoke.

Author's Note: This chapter was hard to write. I kept putting Raven in here, but…yeah she's _dead! _I've decided to go ahead and make Paranormal sequel to September Tears (look on my profile for the summary). Don't worry, those of you confused about the BB and Slade—I'm getting there! Sorry for the wait—having major writer's block, not to mention my computer crashed so…I can't really put it up (I have another computer that has no internet, though).


	8. Never Coming Home

Chapter 7-Never Coming Home

For the remainder of the day, Beast Boy stayed locked in his room, unless the alarm sounded and Robin told him to come. It was around dusk when a knock shattered the silence that lay around him like a somber blanket.

"Who is it?" Beast Boy answered irritably.

"It is Starfire. Please, friend, might you wish to join me in the room of mainness? I was hoping you would join me for…" her voice trailed off.

"For what?"

"Forgive me…I am not to reveal the reason because we…"

"You…?"

"Come with me, and I shall show you." Beast Boy reluctantly opened his door and followed Starfire to the main room. He opened the door, revealing the darkness behind it.

"What am I looking at?" Beast Boy asked in a peevish tone. He flipped on the light.

"SURPRISE!" Cyborg and Robin roared as they sprang out from in front of the sofa.

"What the…what's all this?" Beast Boy questioned in wonder as Starfire jumped up and down, clapping and giggling. He sat down on the couch.

"Well…you were feeling kinda down so…" Robin started, and his voice trailed off. Cyborg finished, "we decided to throw you a party to try and cheer you up. We were going to get Raven, but she wasn't in her room."

Beast Boy shifted uneasily. "She's probably out wandering again."

"She has left us a note to let us understand her absence." Starfire held up a small sheet of paper half covered with Raven's neat, slanted handwriting.

"Oh, well…let's take a look." Robin took the note and read it aloud:

_Dear Titans-  
__I have gone to help Beast Boy (even though Robin told me not to). I will bring him back. Somehow. We'll be back home soon. I'll be okay—don't follow me (that means you, Robin). See you when we get back.  
__  
Your friend,  
__Raven_

Robin looked up from the letter, and his confused gaze matched the others'. Beast Boy looked away, trying to hold back the tears filling his eyes.

"Soooo…where is she now?" Cyborg asked, and all eyes turned to Beast Boy. No one spoke.

"Beast Boy, did you see Raven before you came back?" Robin asked.

"Who cares? She'll come back…" he responded half-heartedly.

"Beast Boy, I need to know."

"So what if I did? You weren't there. For all you know, she could've told me she'd come back later."

"Perhaps if you did see our friend, she must have told you at what point she would come home?" Starfire queried.

Beast Boy chuckled from his misery; his voice showed pity for them, and tears appeared in his eyes. "You just don't get it, do you?"

"Get…what?" Cyborg wondered aloud.

"She's not coming back. She's _dead!_ It's all my fault. She's never coming home! _Never! NEVER!"_ Beast Boy ran out of the main room, sobbing wildly. Robin started after him, but Cyborg put his hand on his shoulder.

"He just needs time." The Titans sadly went their separate ways, going into their rooms to slumber restlessly.

* * *

_He was running—just a little further! Only a little ways left—he would be free. Forever! Nothing could hold him back; not the darkness around him nor the shouts of Slade as he ordered him to stay. Through the inky blackness around him he could see a light, shimmering before him—the outside! Just a little ways left—he would be free!_

_It was a scream—one scream—that stopped him dead in his tracks. "Beast Boy!" she cried, "Help! Please!" He turned, spinning round and round, but could see nothing in the depths around him. The sound came—the horrible sound of bones cracking—crushing—splintering his thoughts. It possessed his mind, and he groaned with sundering pain. No…he couldn't think…he couldn't breathe…he couldn't move. He fell to his knees, crumpling as her screams sung in melody with the dizzying sound of snapping bones, tearing flesh, pouring blood, and cruel gears that refused to pause, the orchestras together hissing in harmony, confirming his fears._

_Tears filled his eyes as he moaned. He could hear Slade's footsteps as he appeared out of the pitch black around him, his mask splattered with blood. Beast Boy gazed up at Slade as he towered over him. Slade reached for him…he grabbed his shoulder…_

Beast Boy jolted upright in his bed. Panting heavily, he gazed through wide eyes at the dark and empty room about him. _No one's there…It was only a dream…_he thought. He could feel the presence, despite his vain attempts to soothe himself. Someone _was_ there—watching him; waiting for him to slumber once more.

His pale face was dripping sweat—everything was: his clothes, his pillow, his bedsheets. Beast Boy lay down on the sweat-soaked pillow, and cried.

* * *

Beast Boy was still crying the next morning as the sun slowly began to illuminate his once-pleasant room with a sleepy bluish light. His clothes, pillows, and sheets were drenched with sweat and tears. Finally as the sunlight burst into his eyes and the sun rose above the city, Beast Boy sat up, wiping the tears from his eyes. Slowly, slowly, he climbed down the ladder at the end of his bed and, faltering awkwardly, left his room.

No one spoke as he entered the main room. An uneasy feeling floated above the room like a miserable cloud. It hung over Beast Boy as the Titans turned away to busy themselves with various activities.

After a few minutes, Robin spoke in a hushed, timid voice to Beast Boy. "Hey, um, Beast Boy…how you doing?"

Beast Boy glared up at him for a moment before irritably responding, "Peachy." With this, he stood, turned away, and left for his room. When he reached the door to the main room, he lingered there and stared about the faces of the Titans. _They used to be my friends. They tried to help me. Theywaited too long. I killed Raven. It's _my _fault. Now, I can only bring them pain._

He wanted to tell them, but he could feel the lump rising in his throat. Finally he spoke in a hoarse, choked whisper, "I'm sorry." He walked away. After a few moments, the Titans could hear him running with an awkward limp to his room. His door slammed shut.

Author's Note: Only one chap left (as far as I know)! I've actually had this done for a long time (the rest of the story too) but I haven't put it up because I'm not happy with it. But it's a hopeless mess, so I'll let you guys judge if it's good or night. Sorry to tell you, but the ending will be a cliffhanger. I think this story is sooo cool, but the sequel is going to blow you away (I hope)! Don't ask what he apologized for—you'll find out in the last chapter. I won't tell! You're just gonna have to wait. The ending won't be as climactic as I'd hoped, but…it still should be pretty good!


	9. Broken Promise

Chapter 8-Broken Promise

He shed his tears silently as he paced his room, lost in the depths of his thoughts. Through the nothingness of his room, a sharp knock shattered the silence.

"Who is it?" Beast Boy said, trying to smother the sound of his voice that revealed his tears.

"It's me," Cyborg said quietly, "Can I come in?"

"No," Beast Boy snapped quickly in response, "you can't."

"BB, I just wanna-"

"I don't _care_ what you want to do. There's nothing you _can _do. Nothing…unless you can go back in time—change the past, stop me—bring her back, you can't help."

"I may not be able to help, but I can try," Cyborg retorted stubbornly. With this, he forced the door open, and walked over to where Beast Boy had sat on the edge of his bed, his face damp and tear-flushed. He sat down beside him, putting his hand on Beast Boy's shoulder and turning him so that he could face him.

"BB…what's happening to you? You leave, and come four months later we've just about given up on you—sinking as low as searching out Slade to find answers…and he tells us he knows where you are—that you were with him. I couldn't believe him—that's not the BB I know. An alarm sounds…and then there you are. That night you come back…you haven't been the same since then. What's happening to you, BB?"

Beast Boy looked away angrily as he lied, "Nothing's happening to me!" He stood and walked toward the door. His pace slowed, until he finally stopped, tears once more coming to his eyes. With a sigh, he slowly began to breathe the story that had haunted his mind untold for four months.

"You can't tell anyone this, alright?" he asked defeatedly.

"I won't."

"Alright," he sighed; "September eleventh—the day I ran away…I was watching TV. At about nine o'clock they announced the—the terrorist attacks…and, my parents—they _worked_ at the Twin Towers…" his voice became choked and raspy as he paused in one final vain attempt to hold back his tears.

"Beast Boy, I—I'm sorry—I didn't know…but—why did you run away?"

Beast Boy thought hard as he battled tears of frustration. "I—I don't know, I guess I just—just wasn't thinking straight. I guess I couldn't take the pain. You guys—you _wanted_ to help, and you _tried _to help, but it only made me feel worse. And so I ran. It was the only thing I _could_ do. It was the only thing that could satisfy the insatiable emptiness inside me. For hours, it seemed, I ran—I only stopped because I couldn't run anymore."

"Then what?" Cyborg said as he leaned forward in suspense.

"I remember…something hitting me on the head, then waking up. I didn't know where I was. Slade was there—he was the _only _one there (I remember the empty, violent feeling there—one that Slade and _only _Slade could emit). He told me to work for him. I told him no, but he kept insisting. He finally asked me what it would take to convince me to stay with him. I told him that unless he could bring my parents back, nothing. He told me he'd bring them back—he _promised_. And I agreed. I guess the pain drove me into temporary insanity, and his promise just…seemed like my last hope.

"After I came back to my senses, I told him I was going home. He told me I couldn't—reminded me of our deal—his promise to bring them back. I said that I knew it was a lie, that he couldn't bring them back to life, and that I wasn't staying there anymore. He said I didn't have a choice…he said he'd hurt you if I didn't serve him. So I did. And I did everything he told me to, no matter how much I hated it. I waited for you guys to come—I knew you were coming. But you never did, and my hope slowly faded into nothing. I gave up."

"We _were_ looking for you, BB, I promise we were," Cyborg gave a futile attempt to help Beast Boy feel a bit better. It didn't work.

Beast Boy glared at Cyborg over his shoulder. "I've learned not to believe promises."

"Well…I'm your friend, BB—you know I wouldn't lie to you. We looked for four months…we tried to find a locator signal; we tried paging you. Nothing worked." A long silence filled the room.

After a few moments, Beast Boy began to weep as he spoke: "Why did Raven have to come after me? If she had just left it alone…she'd still be here. If she had just forgotten about me—never wondering about me ever again…she'd still be alive. Please—just go. I don't want to talk about it anymore." And with this, Cyborg left.

Author's Note: I know, this chapter is a bit shorter than many of the others, but the next part doesn't really fit, because a lot of time is passing. So this explains (briefly) what happened with Beast Boy and Slade. If this isn't enough info, let me know and I'll continue Chapter ½. LPL Tina. Oh, and my sister was trying to help me come up with a better title, and suggested "SSDD". Those of you who have seen the movie "Dreamcatcher" (Stephen King), you know SSDD means "Same Shit Different Day"…kinda fits though, doesn't it? ;)


	10. You're Not Alone

Chapter 9-You're Not Alone

A year passed; with every day Beast Boy grew more and more quiet and reclusive, hardly ever leaving his room and never daring to venture outside the Tower. The Titans understood; he had seen her die, which is a hard thing to live with. They couldn't, however, tell if he actually _believed_ she was dead. He would have to—eventually.

* * *

_He was running—just a little further! Only a little ways left—he would be free. Forever! Nothing could hold him back; not the darkness around him nor the shouts of Slade as he ordered him to stay. Through the inky blackness around him he could see a light, shimmering before him—the outside! Just a little ways left—he would be free!_

_It was a scream—one scream—that stopped him dead in his tracks. "Beast Boy!" she cried, "Help! Please!" He turned, spinning round and round, but could see nothing in the depths around him. The sound came—the horrible sound of bones cracking—crushing—splintering his thoughts. It possessed his mind, and he groaned with sundering pain. No…he couldn't think…he couldn't breathe…he couldn't move. He fell to his knees, crumpling as her screams sung in melody with the dizzying sound of snapping bones, tearing flesh, pouring blood, and cruel gears that refused to pause, the orchestras together hissing in harmony, confirming his fears._

_Tears filled his eyes as he moaned. He could hear Slade's footsteps as he appeared out of the pitch black around him, his mask splattered with blood. Beast Boy gazed up at Slade as he towered over him. Slade reached for him…he grabbed his shoulder…_

Beast Boy jolted upright. The dream…continually it haunted him, leaving him with nothing but sleepless nights to pass away. He climbed down the ladder at the end of his bed, still shaken from the frightening reality that filled every corner of his mind. He leaned on the window sill, looking at what he wished he was brave enough to stare out at.

Snow had begun to cover the January-chilled earth around them, leaving a white blanket behind. Beast Boy stared out at the beauty of the land as the moonlight reflected off of it for hours, thinking. He had not gone to her funeral. It was too hard to think about her, much less see her funeral. Her death…as far as he was concerned, it was _his _fault. As far as he was concerned, he was guilty of _murdering_ her.

Beast Boy tore his gaze reluctantly away from the shimmering blanket, walked over to his door solemnly, and opened it. He walked into the darkened, hollow main room. Where was everyone? It was then he remembered it was still very early morning—three o'clock, maybe?—and decided not to care about the void of a room, or the people who weren't inside it.

After staring into the dark room for a few moments, he left, walking down the hallway. He tried to remember what he had been like over a year ago. Nothing came to him. He could only remember Slade—his voice hissing in his ear, the torture, the despair—the lies…he had forgotten everything else. What it was like to be outside, to have friends—to live.

Beast Boy's eyes fell upon the door of what had been Raven's room. He started to open the door, but, remembering how it upset Raven for someone to enter her room, decided better of it. He stood there, his hand on the smooth door, leaning himself against it, his face suddenly cold from the coolness of it. He shed his tears in silence, alone—no one in the world there to comfort him. It seemed as though the world—including the Titans—had turned against him, casting him out.

_No one cares anymore,_ he thought, _I'm alone now. No one will help me—even hardly speak to me. They just…they don't understand! _He sank to the floor, still leaning against the door. _I wish they would kill me now, and let my dying mind rest. They say I'll be okay, but…I'll never be able to live again. How can I live when I'm already dead?_

Somewhere, a door opened. Beast Boy was jolted from his thoughts and he stood. Letting curiosity get the better of him, he walked down the lonely hallway. Another door opened—just around the corner. He rounded the corner just in time to see the door of the main room close. He waited at the door, debating on whether or not to follow. He could sense the violent feeling in the air and knew something was wrong. Dead wrong.

Finally he decided to see who had gone into the main room. As Beast Boy opened the door and gazed in, he felt the aura of the room and suddenly, as if by magic, the room fell from its semi-black of the moonlit night to a strange, pitch-blackness.

Beast Boy stepped cautiously into the room. He squinted into the darkness, and, seeing nothing, sigh and turned away.

"Why am I all alone?" Beast Boy thought aloud. He turned and stepped toward the door, which closed in front of him, concealing him within the depths of the ominous room. For a moment all was quiet. Then a poisonous laugh shattered the silence, followed by a mocking, deadly voice.

"Dear child—you are anything _but_ alone." He knew it was Slade.

Author's Note: Sorry! I don't _mean _to keep making chapters short—but this was the _perfect _leave-off! I love cliffhangers. I'm sick (again; this is the third day of school I've had to miss this week :( I despise missing school—I get _waaay_ behind…) Don't ask about the ". Dead wrong."—it's an inside joke that became my "writer's trademark"…it's a really retarded story, actually…Sorry I lied—there will be a few more chapters. I promise I it won't be over twelve, though. New chap soon!

Chapter 10-No One's There

Beast Boy turned at the sound of the voice, but saw nothing. His eyes shifted nervously across the black abyss. He _had _heard Slade—he was _sure_ of it. There was no other explanation—unless he had finally been driven to the point of insanity (which was a definite possibility). He was waiting for Slade to appear—to do his worst—perhaps he would kill him, and relieve his pain.

Inevitably an icy hand was placed heavily on his shoulder, chilling him to the bone as he was spun around to face Slade. Beast Boy's eyes were wide with terror as he stared up at the masked creature that loomed above him. Slade's eye was glowing with an angry rage that Beast Boy could only cower below in a quivering reverence.

"Hello again, Beast Boy. It's been a while, hasn't it?" Slade queried in a calm, casual tone.

"What do you want from me?" Beast Boy voice through the lump that had formed in his throat.

"You know _exactly _what I want." Slade thrusted him away; Beast Boy bent backward awkwardly as he hit the sofa. He toppled over it painfully, hit the coffee table with a dull thud, and fell to the ground face-up. Slade walked over to where he had landed and lifted him by his shirt collar, pulling him close to his face. Beast Boy gaped at him, wide-eyed and trembling.

"You swore to serve me; you did not. Did you think you could just walk out the door without a backward glance?" Slade's breath was warm and heavy on Beast Boy's face as he spoke, adding to his terror as he struggled to break free. He felt his shirt collar loosening from the mammoth grip (Note to Self: Or, as Kelly would call it, his "Kung-Fu Grip!"). Suddenly he broke away and jumped back. Tension accompanied the silence that hovered around them as they stood, ready to fight.

It was Beast Boy who finally moved. Without warning he swiftly punted Slade across the face, sending him to the ground. Beast Boy towered over him, feeble and broken, and pinned him so that he couldn't move. Through his anger he was strong enough to hold him there as he spoke.

"You killed her. You promised you wouldn't hurt them. You—" Slade overthrew him, and Beast Boy was sent flying across the room. Slade grabbed him once again by the shirt collar and slammed him against the wall.

"_I_ did nothing—it was _your_ fault, after all. Don't you remember it, Beast Boy? It was _you_ who agreed in the first place because—"

"—because _you _said you'd hurt them."

Behind the mask, Slade smiled—Beast Boy knew it, because of the smile in his eye, and because of the laugh in his voice. "But before that? You believed a lie—a lie that anyone with common sense could have predicted. You walked into a trap, Beast Boy. Is it my fault you're so gullible?" He didn't answer, and Slade continued, "I cannot help that you are oblivious, child. I cannot prevent you from being deceived. I cannot teach you truth from lie. It's your fault, Beast Boy, that she's dead. It's always been your fault—everything—it's _all_ been your fault." Slade released him, and he fell to the ground. Slade was silently smiling behind his mask as he stared down at Beast Boy, who could only cover is face with his hands and sob.

"I killed her…it _was_ my fault…I deserve to die…I'm worthless…"

"Yes, Beast Boy, you are a wretch who can't be cured—can't be saved." The evil anticipation in Slade's voice grew as he spoke. Beast Boy was believing him—believing his lies—once more.

Beast Boy looked up at him, staring at the demon who had turned him into this miserable creature that he was so ashamed of. He wished that looks _could _kill—it would be the only way he could kill Slade. Finally he spoke softly and angrily to the monster.

"You bastard…" Beast Boy said through gritted teeth. (Note to Self: Sorry—couldn't resist!) The tension grew stronger over them as the anxiety filled the air around them once more. Slade seemed startled; the smile disappeared from his eye, which was filled with rage once more. Neither of them moved.

"You killed her, you _bastard!"_ Beast Boy yelled. He stood to face Slade, who threw a punch at him. Beast Boy ducked; the punch landed above him, and his fist easily plowed through the wall with a horrible screech.

Slade brought his hand out of the wall, which had caved into a horrible crater. Beast Boy stared at the cavern in wonder, and then turned to look at Slade, only to see the fist hurdling toward him again. He didn't have time to evade the blow, and it nailed him on the nose, leaving it maimed and bleeding.

Beast Boy could feel himself about to fall, dazed by the blow. He slid down against the wall, trying to recover from the impact. Soon enough, he stood in front of Slade. The smile appeared in Slade's eye once more as he round-house kicked Beast Boy. He made no effort to dodge, and it landed on the right side of his face—beside his lip, and Beast Boy fell sideways, landing hard on the floor and sliding across it.

Slade walked apathetically to where Beast Boy had landed. He looked wearily up at the towering beast, and, briefly, gave up. But, against his better judgement, he stood once again, glaring at him in rage, panting and bleeding. Slade chuckled, his eye twinkling with laughter, intrigued in the battle that he would surely win.

Mustering all the strength he had left, Beast Boy threw a punch at Slade, who dodged and slung him across the sofa. Beast Boy flipped hard onto the coffee table once more, landing on his left arm, which emitted a horrible crack in response. The sound pleased Slade, and he turned to leave, satisfied. He no longer wanted Beast Boy as his apprentice; he would recruit someone stronger, better—someone who wasn't as gullible as Beast Boy.

Miraculously Beast Boy stood. He hastily walked toward Slade until he was behind him. He faltered quick as he could, and reached the door. He stood there, spreading his arms out despite the pain of his broken limb, blocking Slade's path. Slade stopped dead in his tracks, and stared in disbelief before smiling. They lingered there, and Slade's excitement awaited Beast Boy's next move.

"This isn't over Slade—it won't be until you're _dead_," he said rashly. Silence. Finally Slade chuckled as he threw a final punch, which Beast Boy caught. Mustering what little strength he had, he threw Slade across the room. Slade flipped painfully over the sofa onto the coffee table, snapping it in half easily. (Note to Self: Don't you feel _so _sorry for the coffee table? It keeps getting battered by them!)

Slade stood and walked toward Beast Boy, anger fuelling his steps. Beast Boy threw another punch, which landed on the side of Slade's face. Slade seemed to teeter in mid-air for a moment, as if someone had paused him. Then he flew across the room, ramming head-long into the wall. He simply sat there where he had fallen and waited.

Beast Boy stood in rage, panting and bleeding, lingering the doorway. Slade stared, and his eyes twisted into a wry grin. He spoke casually.

"Good work, apprentice. I've taught you well—haven't I?"

Beast Boy's anger released its grip on his mind, and he came to realization. Falling to his knees and staring down at his blood-splattered hands, he spoke quietly: "I'm no better than you—fighting for revenge—I've stooped to your level now…I'm like you now…I…what have I done? God…"

"You're pathetic; worthless; insignificant; unimportant. No one cares—and neither do I." Slade left, leaving Beast Boy on his knees, crying and bloody. He acted as if nothing had happened.

"No one's there…" Beast Boy said quietly as he wept.

Author's Note: I wasn't planning on bringing Slade back in this story, but…I did anyway! I like this fight scene, but I don't think the description worked out right. Oh well…Yes the title is from "My Last Breath" by Evanescence. It was originally "No One Cares", but it sounds like "No one's there" from the song, and it was in my head so I added the last part with Beast Boy talking so I could use that as my title. Anyway, the next chapter _should _be the end of the story (not counting the Epilogue), but you never know where inspiration will take me ;)


	11. No One's There

Chapter 10-No One's There

Beast Boy turned at the sound of the voice, but saw nothing. His eyes shifted nervously across the black abyss. He _had _heard Slade—he was _sure_ of it. There was no other explanation—unless he had finally been driven to the point of insanity (which was a definite possibility). He was waiting for Slade to appear—to do his worst—perhaps he would kill him, and relieve his pain.

Inevitably an icy hand was placed heavily on his shoulder, chilling him to the bone as he was spun around to face Slade. Beast Boy's eyes were wide with terror as he stared up at the masked creature that loomed above him. Slade's eye was glowing with an angry rage that Beast Boy could only cower below in a quivering reverence.

"Hello again, Beast Boy. It's been a while, hasn't it?" Slade queried in a calm, casual tone.

"What do you want from me?" Beast Boy voice through the lump that had formed in his throat.

"You know _exactly _what I want." Slade thrusted him away; Beast Boy bent backward awkwardly as he hit the sofa. He toppled over it painfully, hit the coffee table with a dull thud, and fell to the ground face-up. Slade walked over to where he had landed and lifted him by his shirt collar, pulling him close to his face. Beast Boy gaped at him, wide-eyed and trembling.

"You swore to serve me; you did not. Did you think you could just walk out the door without a backward glance?" Slade's breath was warm and heavy on Beast Boy's face as he spoke, adding to his terror as he struggled to break free. He felt his shirt collar loosening from the mammoth grip (Note to Self: Or, as Kelly would call it, his "Kung-Fu Grip!"). Suddenly he broke away and jumped back. Tension accompanied the silence that hovered around them as they stood, ready to fight.

It was Beast Boy who finally moved. Without warning he swiftly punted Slade across the face, sending him to the ground. Beast Boy towered over him, feeble and broken, and pinned him so that he couldn't move. Through his anger he was strong enough to hold him there as he spoke.

"You killed her. You promised you wouldn't hurt them. You—" Slade overthrew him, and Beast Boy was sent flying across the room. Slade grabbed him once again by the shirt collar and slammed him against the wall.

"_I_ did nothing—it was _your_ fault, after all. Don't you remember it, Beast Boy? It was _you_ who agreed in the first place because—"

"—because _you _said you'd hurt them."

Behind the mask, Slade smiled—Beast Boy knew it, because of the smile in his eye, and because of the laugh in his voice. "But before that? You believed a lie—a lie that anyone with common sense could have predicted. You walked into a trap, Beast Boy. Is it my fault you're so gullible?" He didn't answer, and Slade continued, "I cannot help that you are oblivious, child. I cannot prevent you from being deceived. I cannot teach you truth from lie. It's your fault, Beast Boy, that she's dead. It's always been your fault—everything—it's _all_ been your fault." Slade released him, and he fell to the ground. Slade was silently smiling behind his mask as he stared down at Beast Boy, who could only cover is face with his hands and sob.

"I killed her…it _was_ my fault…I deserve to die…I'm worthless…"

"Yes, Beast Boy, you are a wretch who can't be cured—can't be saved." The evil anticipation in Slade's voice grew as he spoke. Beast Boy was believing him—believing his lies—once more.

Beast Boy looked up at him, staring at the demon who had turned him into this miserable creature that he was so ashamed of. He wished that looks _could _kill—it would be the only way he could kill Slade. Finally he spoke softly and angrily to the monster.

"You bastard…" Beast Boy said through gritted teeth. (Note to Self: Sorry—couldn't resist!) The tension grew stronger over them as the anxiety filled the air around them once more. Slade seemed startled; the smile disappeared from his eye, which was filled with rage once more. Neither of them moved.

"You killed her, you _bastard!"_ Beast Boy yelled. He stood to face Slade, who threw a punch at him. Beast Boy ducked; the punch landed above him, and his fist easily plowed through the wall with a horrible screech.

Slade brought his hand out of the wall, which had caved into a horrible crater. Beast Boy stared at the cavern in wonder, and then turned to look at Slade, only to see the fist hurdling toward him again. He didn't have time to evade the blow, and it nailed him on the nose, leaving it maimed and bleeding.

Beast Boy could feel himself about to fall, dazed by the blow. He slid down against the wall, trying to recover from the impact. Soon enough, he stood in front of Slade. The smile appeared in Slade's eye once more as he round-house kicked Beast Boy. He made no effort to dodge, and it landed on the right side of his face—beside his lip, and Beast Boy fell sideways, landing hard on the floor and sliding across it.

Slade walked apathetically to where Beast Boy had landed. He looked wearily up at the towering beast, and, briefly, gave up. But, against his better judgement, he stood once again, glaring at him in rage, panting and bleeding. Slade chuckled, his eye twinkling with laughter, intrigued in the battle that he would surely win.

Mustering all the strength he had left, Beast Boy threw a punch at Slade, who dodged and slung him across the sofa. Beast Boy flipped hard onto the coffee table once more, landing on his left arm, which emitted a horrible crack in response. The sound pleased Slade, and he turned to leave, satisfied. He no longer wanted Beast Boy as his apprentice; he would recruit someone stronger, better—someone who wasn't as gullible as Beast Boy.

Miraculously Beast Boy stood. He hastily walked toward Slade until he was behind him. He faltered quick as he could, and reached the door. He stood there, spreading his arms out despite the pain of his broken limb, blocking Slade's path. Slade stopped dead in his tracks, and stared in disbelief before smiling. They lingered there, and Slade's excitement awaited Beast Boy's next move.

"This isn't over Slade—it won't be until you're _dead_," he said rashly. Silence. Finally Slade chuckled as he threw a final punch, which Beast Boy caught. Mustering what little strength he had, he threw Slade across the room. Slade flipped painfully over the sofa onto the coffee table, snapping it in half easily. (Note to Self: Don't you feel _so _sorry for the coffee table? It keeps getting battered by them!)

Slade stood and walked toward Beast Boy, anger fueling his steps. Beast Boy threw another punch, which landed on the side of Slade's face. Slade seemed to teeter in mid-air for a moment, as if someone had paused him. Then he flew across the room, ramming head-long into the wall. He simply sat there where he had fallen and waited.

Beast Boy stood in rage, panting and bleeding, lingering the doorway. Slade stared, and his eyes twisted into a wry grin. He spoke casually.

"Good work, apprentice. I've taught you well—haven't I?"

Beast Boy's anger released its grip on his mind, and he came to realization. Falling to his knees and staring down at his blood-splattered hands, he spoke quietly: "I'm no better than you—fighting for revenge—I've stooped to your level now…I'm like you now…I…what have I done? God…"

"You're pathetic; worthless; insignificant; unimportant. No one cares—and neither do I." Slade left, leaving Beast Boy on his knees, crying and bloody. He acted as if nothing had happened.

"No one's there…" Beast Boy said quietly as he wept.

Author's Note: I wasn't planning on bringing Slade back in this story, but…I did anyway! I like this fight scene, but I don't think the description worked out right. Oh well…Yes the title is from "My Last Breath" by Evanescence. It was originally "No One Cares", but it sounds like "No one's there" from the song, and it was in my head so I added the last part with Beast Boy talking so I could use that as my title. Anyway, the next chapter _should _be the end of the story (not counting the Epilogue), but you never know where inspiration will take me ;)


	12. My Suicide

Chapter 11-My Suicide

A faint gray light began to blanket the room. Beast Boy lay on the floor, unable to cry any longer. His anger…he had lost control—he hadn't _meant_ to—but he did. Did this make him a threat to the Titans—or to himself? He wasn't sure, though he guessed it didn't. He was wrong. Dead wrong.

The door opened, revealing a groggy Robin with a sleep-flushed face. He looked at Beast Boy in surprise, raising a sleepy eyebrow as he spoke tiredly: "Beast Boy? What are you—" Robin glanced around, noticing the marred room around him, "what _happened_, Beast Boy?"

Beast Boy looked at him stoically, half-dried blood caked around his nose and lip, and the gashes across his whole body. "Nothing happened. Nothing at all," he said in a sharp, hypnotized-like monotone. He stood, seemingly unconscious to the arm that was bent into an awkward position that seemed almost completely backward the wrong way.

"Something _had _to have happened. Why is the main room so messed up? What happened to you? Who beat you up?" Robin asked, unconvinced by Beast Boy's answer.

"I told you, _nothing happened_," he said, anger rising in his voice.

"Who hurt you, Beast Boy?" Robin insisted.

_"No one hurt me!"_ Beast Boy said as he attempted to remain calm.

"Beast Boy, stop messing around. Tell me what happened."

"Nothing happened!" Beast Boy yelled as he clenched his fists.

"Beast Boy, I—"

"You'll shut up if you don't want me to beat the—"

"Don't threaten me! I'm only trying to _help!" _Robin snarled in warning.

Beast Boy shoved past him as he faltered to the door. He lingered there a moment, then glared over his shoulder at Robin, whose face was tense and angry. He spoke softly, anger still in his voice.

"You can _help_ by leaving me alone." Beast Boy left, the door closing behind him. Robin could only stare in stunned silence after him. He sighed, walked over to the tattered sofa, and gaped at the broken coffee table.

* * *

He locked the door behind him. Lying solemnly face-up across the floor, he thought as he listened to the silence around him. The one thing he craved more than anything was death. Lusting for it, the thought of him, smiling as he finally died, haunted his mind. Day after day, he yearned for it. It was driving him mad—though he didn't realize it.

The days passed, and with each, he pined for death more and more. He refused to speak, to eat—he refused to believe he was alive. He had lost it all—he could never be able to retrieve it again. He had to face it—he had turned on his friends; he had _become _Slade's apprentice—his shadow, his disciple, his follower. He had become Slade's apprentice.

But he didn't want to lie anymore. And yet, he was sick of everything: sick the truth, sick of having friends who wanted to help—that refused to leave him alone, sick of life. Beast Boy felt as though he would never die now. He tried not to let go of reality, but it was all in vain. He lost it all.

He glanced over at a clock that read **6:00am**. Beast Boy sighed, stood unenthusiastically and half-heartedly walked to the door. Opening it, he walked out of his room, down the hallway, and up the stairs until he reached the roof. Once there, he opened the door that lead out on the roof of Titans tower. He gazed outward at the sea as it shimmered beneath the twilight of dawn. He stared down over the edge of the tower, down at the rocks lying below in a deadly disarray. He thought about jumping. He decided he'd never be brave enough to jump. He was wrong. Dead wrong.

* * *

"Beast Boy! I have not seen you in many days. You are—okay, yes? Robin had told me of the ravished room of mainness, and how you were the only one there when he entered it. I wish to understand the cause. You wish to do the 'chatting', perhaps?" Starfire said as Beast Boy walked wearily into the tower two hours later. He wished he _had_ jumped.

"I know, peachy, congrats, oh well, no," he answered boredly before walking past her. She stared in wonder after him, then started after him.

"Please, Beast Boy—I do not mean harm—I merely wish to understand, so that I might help you to overcome your problems," she insisted.

"I don't _have _a problem, okay?" Beast Boy snapped.

"Robin says that something is wrong—though he is not sure what. Cyborg seems to understand, but he will not enlighten us on the cause for your sad and irritable behavior. He says he cannot tell us—he says he is the 'sworn to secrecy'," Starfire persisted.

"You want to know what's wrong? Fine, I'll sing. My life is going down the drain all because I'm a wimp, and I _just can't take it anymore!"_ Beast Boy stormed past her and going back to the roof, leaving Starfire in a baffled silence.

* * *

The door slammed close behind him. His head throbbed with pain as his whole body shrieked with anger. He ran madly to the edge of the Tower, and stared longingly at the rocks below. He screamed to himself, "I can't _take it anymore!"_ His knees buckled with rage and fear beneath him, and he allowed them to slide from beneath him.

He plummeted feet-first downward, wind biting at his whole body like rabid wolves, shredding his clothes and rending his flesh. (Note to Self: Not really—just deep description :)) He knew the rocks were coming—he hoped they'd kill him.

The impact came, snapping his legs like twigs within a child's hands. The blow damaged him badly, and he was knocked into his deep slumber.

Author's Note: This is the last chapter, though I will write an epilogue that takes place when the Titans find out. Before anyone says anything, let me clarify that he did go 'insane' at that time. He realized he couldn't take it anymore, and decided death was the only way for him to escape. However, he didn't mean to fall. He just...did.And yes the title did come from the last line in "Tourniquet" by Evanescence. It was just stuck in my head…:)


	13. Epilogue

Epilogue

"He'll be okay, though, right? He's not going to…" Cyborg's voice trailed off as he stared in disbelief at the broken and bloody body of Beast Boy.

"Not sure," Robin replied as he bandaged one of his arms.

"Please—what has happened to our friend?" Starfire queried as tears filled her eyes.

"There's really no way to know. I can still detect a heart beat, though," Robin pointed out as he looked at the heart monitor, "I'm not sure if he'll live or not."

"If he does, he'll be fine, right? He won't be hurt or anything…will he?" Cyborg asked hopefully as he attempted to hold back the tears in his own eyes.

"Too soon to tell," Robin replied, and silence filled the room as the conversation ended abruptly. (Note to Self: Don't you just _love_ the way Robin talks in sentence fragments?)

* * *

They did all they could for Beast Boy, then left, and sat silently in the main room."I only wish we might have prevented this from occurring. Beast Boy seemed…mirthless when I last spoke with him," Starfire commented in a tiny voice. "He mentioned that he could not take something any longer, but what he did not say…"

Cyborg was thoughtful; he knew what Beast Boy had meant. He couldn't take life anymore…He was sick from the taste of his own tears as they slid down his cheek and slithered between his lips to dance on his tongue. His mind was a roller coaster, speeding through the various thoughts and looping around his senses, running through Beast Boy's story upside-down, combing it for details.

"Cyborg!" Robin's voice snapped him out of thought, and he looked over at him.

"Cyborg—you okay? You look sick, and you act like something's wrong."

Cyborg sighed, defeated. "Beast Boy told me what happened—that day he ran away, a long time ago…He didn't want me to tell, but now, I think it's best both of you know the truth." And he recited the story that Beast Boy had told him, trying to think this was all a dream—that he would wake up, and Beast Boy would be leaning over him, grinning with shining eyes, begging him to play video games. But he knew it wouldn't happen.

Starfire and Robin listened, intrigued, as Cyborg finished. No one spoke for a while.

"So what do we do now?" Robin asked, despair clouding the confidence that usually haunted his now-quavering voice.

"Surely there must be something we can attempt," Starfire managed to squeak between her sobs.

"I guess…we wait, and hope for the best. It's about the only thing we _can _do for now," Cyborg replied quietly.

Author's Note: Oh yeah! IT'S _DONE! _I thought I'd never finish it! Don't forget, the story isn't over yet! Paranormal will be the sequel, so look for it!

—FIN—  
(for now)


End file.
